“Hypersexualitation“, a title that would caught the attention of anybody. Despites the word may sound kind of festive for some, it’s a very worrying and serious issue. An issue of public health, some may say, and it’s also a very taboo topic that few people will feel comfortable talking about or even admiting it. So, what is all about?
We live in the most sexually opened society of history. The repression of sex and its negative connotations (at least in Western culture) belong to the past forever, and we all agree that it’s something enjoyable, healthy and promotes the development of individuals. But both, defect and excess, can be dangerous, and today in our society we’re facing a kind of ‘ unhealthy obsession’ about it. Wherever we look, we can see something related to sex: advertising use it all the time to sell us things, not only in tv ads, but in billboards, newspapers, etc., it takes over series, movies and conversations… But the most important role is played here by the Internet, wich has make avalaible and spread pornography to all sectors of population. Somehow, society doesn’t just allow people to have sex, it ‘forces‘ people to do it, like some kind of imperative, like an indicator of some status. Sex is becoming a new addiction that leads many people to destroy their lifes, like any other type of drug. And why lose money buying drugs if they’re inside ourselves, with the pleasure our brain give us as gratifications? The percentage of people adicted to sex grows unstoppably, and now it’s of 8%. That number in a population of, for example, forty million people, represents three million affected. Isn’t it disturbing? If it was an infectious deseases, it’d considered as epidemic.
But let’s take a look at porn industry in the Internet. Before populatization and developing of the web, pornography was just restricted to some paper publications and films one had to buy and were only accesible to adults. But with the Internet, it’s become mainly free, easy to find as typing two words and press enter, and available to anyone, so it has a lot to do with this new rise of sexual addiction, although this is not the only consequence of this. Before talking about it, first here go some information about the pornography industry nowadays:
-It’s the second enterteinment business in revenue, only after the videogame industry, leaving far behind music and cinema. It’s also past alcoholic and pharmacutical industries, and only oil is before it.
-Many technologies now used in the Internet in other contexts, like streaming video, pop-ups, bitcoins and other methods of payment where developed because of the interests of porn industry in them.
– It’s clear how porn websites where users have to pay for the services are maintened, but what about free porn webs? Some of them are used by payment sites to promote, but the truth is that many are just used to launder money from traffiking in women. For this, they can used ads on the website and award themselves all the clicks they want.
Well, pornography, with control, can be enriching and make more interesting sexual intercourse, but has many risks too that starts to become noted:
– 90% of children between 8 and 16 years have watched porn, and boys from 12 to 17 years old are the largest consumers of porn. At early ages like 8 or 12, ‘striking’ pictures or sequences that are hardly understood can get stuck in the brain, somehow changing the view of the aspects related. Children exposed to explicit manifestations of sexuality can lead to the premature end of boyhood. It’s not rare to hear comments like ‘Now thirteen year olds make the things fifteen year old used to do’ or to see twelve-year old girls wearing make up and dressed like a twenty year old.
– 68% of men and 18% of women said they used pornography at least once every week. Compulsive consumption of porn can develop like the use of a drug, where there’s always a need of increase the dose or use more hard substances. This is equivalent in porn to the need of most explicit or hard contents that eventually leads to genres where sex and violence, the most primary impulses of any animal, are mixed (abusive, ilegal or unsafe practices. 88% of scenes contain physical aggression, 49% verbal). The consquence of this is the brutalization, the destruction of the erotic, as it’s oppossed to it, where erotism is a game of light and shadow, of insinutation, porn is obscenely explicit, selfish and even humiliating to all participants, denies the encounter with the other. Where does necking, tenderness and affection left? What is humanity?
– The easy ways to get sexual material to please oneself whenever desired against all the effor is requiered to look for and keep by one’s side a partner makes far more comfortable to many people to just reduced sexuality to the individual level, forgetting about exploring it with a partner. A mutilation of a wonderful part of human experience that can lead to isolation and loneliness. So addiciton to sex doesn’t mean here to exhibit a really promiscuous and uncontrolled behavior towards others, it just affects the individual.
Analizing all of the exposed above, we can get to the conclussion that hypersexualitation is taking us into a society of emotionally handicapped and childish individuals, completely centered in theirselves, monstrously selfish and incapable of love, incapable of open up to others, who cover their emotional needs with excess. And why is the reason of all this? The fear to suffering, to being hurt, the imposibility of manage with this kind of emotions that makes a hundred times more desirable to live completely alone. Another consequence of an alienated society that turns everything into market products.
Recently, while making a bit of research about all this, I found a documentary about Japan, titled ‘The empire of the without-sex’, which talked about all I’ve written about here, which is becoming a reality and a very serious problem in todays Japan. This country has the largest sex industry in the world but, paradoxically, it’s the country where less sex is practiced (I mean in couple). Why? Well, in the documentary were shown testimonies of women who affirmed they just have sex with their husbands twice a year or that they’ve been twenty years without doing it. Also, a producer of woman-shaped dolls said striking sentences like this one: “A doll has many advantages over real woman: don’t whine, they’re less complicated and you don’t have to give them presents. They’re men’s future“. So doll manufacteres tries to make dolls which resemblace women and real women try to resemblance dolls, like ‘Lolitas’. And the fact that young man pays women other than their wifes or girlfriends to take care of them, give them demonstrations of affection and flirt it’s also worrying. There’s something deeply disturbing in paying for a pantomime of love. Another epic affirmation comes from a man interviewed in the investigation. He states that: “I’m not in making love to a girl because I have to worry about her pleasure. I prefer to pay and then just be able to think about me“. Really generous. But there’s more, others said that “Having a girlfriend is just like having a good car, you’ve got beautiful thing there and that’s all“. Or the well-known “If you have boy/girlfriend, you don’t have freedom“. Personally, I’ll never understand why having a partner conflicts with remaining independent and free, if someone could explain to me, I’ll be thankfull. But the height is reached when a man, incapable of getting a girlfriend, visits every week a cat coffee (yeah, a coffee shop where there are cats) and expend some hours caressing them as some substitute of human contact. At that point, I was chilling in horror. And I think it’s not just a problem of sex, it’s a problem of communication, it’s a problem of capacity to love. So I’d like to end with the questions that ends the documentary:
Couple dissapears to benefit the individual, each floating in their own bubble, preferring themselseves before the others, sex is no longer a means to build up the couple and the individual, but a simple emergency exit, an evasion of reality, the desperate search for comfort and retreat into themselves are part of this new self-centered sexuality. Are just Japan so strange or are they forward?